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Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Broker Gifts that Don't Suck

I recently installed the new Google Chrome beta OS, and during the transition to this high-powered software I managed to lose my saved "login and password information". Luckily, this didn't impact any of the password-protected websites I browse since I check things like bank statements, gmail, twitter, facebook, credit cards, etc on a daily basis so the passwords are hard-wired into the subconscious of my typing fingers. Or so I thought, until I remembered that I actually had a blog as well.... and for the life of me I could not figure out how to log into this POS. Oh well, yet another monthly reminder that I should probably put more effort into blogging. Anyway.... I've reset the password so now there's the chance I start posting more than once a month- We'll see! Anyway, moving on to the point of the post:

The main determinant of how hedge funds allocate their trades between brokers- Anecdotal evidence provided by the low man on the totem pole of an unknown fund not based in NYC

The holiday season at a hedge fund is usually a happy time as an analyst for a couple reasons:

1) Senior people go on vacation for extended periods of time, allowing you to browse youtube and facebook for extended periods of time

2) Bonus season is close and the disappointment from last year has faded over the past 11 months, so you are naive and optimistic about the number

3) And most importantly, the broker gifts start arriving! All year sell-side firms vie for your firm's business, offering research, access to management teams, execution, etc. But it is a little known fact that none of these matter, and the only real way to distinguish yourself is through the holiday gift. I had the (mis)fortune of starting work in this industry in 2007, so really only had one good year of gifts before the recession hit and the presents went to sh*t. Oh well, I still fondly remember the 10 pound metal container of candy from GS that I stole out of the kitchen and kept under my desk. But anyway, ever since then the gifts have been awful. I can't tell you how many fruit baskets that have remained unopened and unloved (FYI Bulge-Bracket: a fruit-basket garners you no trades) in HF kitchens across the globe. So you can imagine my surprise when last week (Note: not a holiday season for any religion that I am familiar with) a broker gift came from the Barclays Capital. Barc holds a special place in my heart as it is the home to the top nat gas analyst on the street, none other than the esteemed AVP James R. Crandell. That being said, I can't say it is known for gifts. But anyway, I'll stop dragging this out and get to the chase and display the gift. I don't believe any commentary is necessary from me in order to explain how amazing (think +7 std devs) this gift was. Thank you Barclays, get ready for some trades!

"Hot Liquidity"- Habanero Hot Sauce, gift from the LX Liquidity Cross dark pool (fastest growing dark pool in the US in '10 with 120% growth!). Contact the Barclay's electronic sales desk for hot sauce samples.

1 comment:

  1. Jimmy must have come up with that one! Awesome.